I Loved What You Said So Much That I Forgot to Pay Attention
Saturday, October 17th, 2009 at
9:51 am
admin asked:
When was the last time you mentally finished someones sentence while he or she was still saying it? Did you guess correctly? When you do, you feel clairvoyant. But when you’re totally wrong, you’ll probably be a bit confused and lost in the conversation.
Mentally guessing someone’s thought can be fun but interrupting someone to finish their thought can lead to major communication problems, including the dreaded “foot in mouth disease.” While you may be tempted to blurt out whatever comes into your mind, here are some quick tips that celebrate silence.
Let them finish!
Just about everyone thinks whatever they’re saying is incredibly important. It may not be but isn’t it smarter to give the talker their moment in the sun and make them feel special? You’ll score major points on the job and at home. Try it for a few days and I’ll bet people will start saying what a good listener you are.
Know What They’re Saying!
Think about the last time someone was driving you somewhere and he or she took and unexpected turn or shortcut. How did it make you feel? Perhaps a little confused for a moment. The same applies to conversations. It’s very easy to think too much about the destination rather than the journey. Make sure you know where the other person is going before you speak.
But What I Have to Say Is Brilliant!
It may be and it may be worth jumping into the conversation before the other person has finished speaking but do you want to risk having a conversation blowout? When communication breaks down between two people, one person usually thinks, “This person is an idiot,” or “They’re not listening to me which means they don’t care about me.” If you’re talking to someone who knows you, there’s a good chance they’ll cut you some slack. But others may not be so kind. Pay attention to their body language for clues about their feelings.
Biting Your Tongue Doesn’t Have to Hurt!
If you do blurt out something wrong before someone has finished a sentence, be humble. There’s nothing wrong with saying, “I’m really excited about what your talking about but I’m not sure I understood it correctly. Would you mind repeating it?” This should make the other party feel special and allow the conversation to get back on track.
Miscommunication can cost us valuable time, friendships, and opportunities. So listen a little better and I think you’ll see it can produce some fantastic results.
Ken Okel is a communications expert who uses real life broadcasting experiences to help successful organizations communicate better, reduce stress, and laugh more. For his free newsletter and special report, 7 Communication Mistakes that are Costing You Money, go to http://www.kenokel.com/
And to see video of Ken presenting the FAMOUS POLICE DOG ATTACK STORY go to http://www.kenokel.com/video.html
When was the last time you mentally finished someones sentence while he or she was still saying it? Did you guess correctly? When you do, you feel clairvoyant. But when you’re totally wrong, you’ll probably be a bit confused and lost in the conversation.
Mentally guessing someone’s thought can be fun but interrupting someone to finish their thought can lead to major communication problems, including the dreaded “foot in mouth disease.” While you may be tempted to blurt out whatever comes into your mind, here are some quick tips that celebrate silence.
Let them finish!
Just about everyone thinks whatever they’re saying is incredibly important. It may not be but isn’t it smarter to give the talker their moment in the sun and make them feel special? You’ll score major points on the job and at home. Try it for a few days and I’ll bet people will start saying what a good listener you are.
Know What They’re Saying!
Think about the last time someone was driving you somewhere and he or she took and unexpected turn or shortcut. How did it make you feel? Perhaps a little confused for a moment. The same applies to conversations. It’s very easy to think too much about the destination rather than the journey. Make sure you know where the other person is going before you speak.
But What I Have to Say Is Brilliant!
It may be and it may be worth jumping into the conversation before the other person has finished speaking but do you want to risk having a conversation blowout? When communication breaks down between two people, one person usually thinks, “This person is an idiot,” or “They’re not listening to me which means they don’t care about me.” If you’re talking to someone who knows you, there’s a good chance they’ll cut you some slack. But others may not be so kind. Pay attention to their body language for clues about their feelings.
Biting Your Tongue Doesn’t Have to Hurt!
If you do blurt out something wrong before someone has finished a sentence, be humble. There’s nothing wrong with saying, “I’m really excited about what your talking about but I’m not sure I understood it correctly. Would you mind repeating it?” This should make the other party feel special and allow the conversation to get back on track.
Miscommunication can cost us valuable time, friendships, and opportunities. So listen a little better and I think you’ll see it can produce some fantastic results.
Ken Okel is a communications expert who uses real life broadcasting experiences to help successful organizations communicate better, reduce stress, and laugh more. For his free newsletter and special report, 7 Communication Mistakes that are Costing You Money, go to http://www.kenokel.com/
And to see video of Ken presenting the FAMOUS POLICE DOG ATTACK STORY go to http://www.kenokel.com/video.html
Filed under: Clairvoyant
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